Corrupt A Wish

In each post you must grant the wish of the person above you and then make a wish of your own. Only in granting their wish you must twist it, or screw it up, or pervert it, or just mangle it because, hell, it's fun. For example....

I wish that I had a pair of brand new trainers.

>You: Granted, but they're size 147.

Anyhow, I'll set things off...

I wish for an apple.

granted but its mouldy

i wish i had a 3ds

A 3DS that has a cracked screen, and doesn't play in 3D. Also, on a ship around other side of the world, frozen, with no-one alive on board.

I wish for a 3DS also, but with nothing wrong with it at all, everything about it is perfect, and it gets to me on time, and without any problems; also that nothing comes to harm me when playing it, and everything works just fine.

Granted, but you lose al of your fingers.

I wish for a pony.

Granted but it dies after 5 minutes.

I wish for a knife

Unfortunately, there is no such thing as magic in this world, therefore you do not get your knife.

I wish for a never-ending pencil.

Granted but you trip over while holding it and it burns in the fire.

I wish for a baseball bat

Granted but its made out of dust

i wish that i could be a panda bear

Granted but you die of overeating as the bamboo is too tasty

I wish for all the stupid mario brothers episodes to come out

Storm wrote:

i wish that i could be a panda bear

That was going to be my next wish

Granted. They suck so much that your eyes bleed.

I wish to gain the power of invisibility.

Granted. The world can't see you but you can't see the world. You walk into a wall and die.

I wish I didn't have tot go to school.

Granted. But you spend your life in a blank room with no door.

I wish i fell off a cliff.

Not granted. You are about to but I save you.

I wish that storm was dead

Granted but he came back as a ghost to haunt you forever.

I wish i could never have to sleep.

Granted, but a thug breaks into your house and steals everything, unfortunately you're too tired to chase him.

I wish I had a tail.

Granted but It's too heavy so you can't move

I wish for world domination

Granted, but your "world domination" is on Mars.

I wish for a nice clean bed.

Granted but you die in your sleep

I wish for inteligence

Granted. You learn how to beat super Mario bros ds and learnt how to spell intelligence but that is all

I wish I was the richest boy in the world

Granted, but everyone hates you.

I wish to be able to walk on water.

Granted but only for 0.0000001 seconds.

I wish that i was the king of Earth.

Granted, but one day there's a flood and you were out whipping your slave to mow the lawn when suddenly you got smashed by the water and flew into a minefield.

I wish for my birthday to come earlier.

Granted but you choked on your birthday cake.

I wish for Psneku and all my friends to find happieness.

(Aww, so sweet, too bad I have to corrupt it. D:)
Granted, but you don't and get run over by a truck while crossing the road to buy the shopping.

I wish that our new member is active.

Too bad
He isn't

I wish for Psyneku to smile